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Are You in a Toxic Relationship?

May 6, 2018 by

You probably realize by just the term that a toxic relationship is bad, but how do you know if you are in one? What does that really mean?

It is true that toxic relationships may be difficult to spot. While some abusive behaviors are obviously unhealthy, other signs may be more subtle. However, they can be just as detrimental.

No relationship is perfect and every relationship is somewhere on the spectrum of toxicity. Relationships can always use some work, but when a toxic relationship becomes out of control, problems will arise. Here are some signs that you might be in a toxic relationship.

Your Partner Never Admits Fault

If you have to walk on eggshells when reminding your partner to clean up their clothes, that is likely a red flag. People who are healthy welcome feedback and put themselves back on the right track. However, a toxic partner may blame you for the fact that they somehow messed up.

It is important to remember that this can go both ways. Think about how your partner affects you, but also consider how you affect your partner. If you are the one who is constantly turning things around, you may be the one who is making the relationship toxic.

You Don’t Take Care of Yourself

Your own behavior can indicate that you have a toxic partner. The act of self-care is critical to the success of every relationship to keep it healthy. If you?re not taking care of yourself for any reason (like constantly changing your schedule to suit your partner) it is a sign that the relationship is becoming toxic.

You Get the Cold Shoulder

It is normal for partners to have arguments, but if your partner shuts down when you approach them about something that is on your mind, this may be a sign of a toxic relationship. In a healthy relationship, each partner is willing to listen to the other person’s feedback because they want each other to be happy. People want to be able to effectively communicate with their partner to work out the kinks. If your partner keeps telling you that they don?t want to talk about the relationship, looks away, and becomes unresponsive, that?s a sign of toxicity.

You’re Exhausted

If your relationship feels like it is draining you and leaving you with very little energy to spare, this is not a good sign. This feeling may even begin to show itself physically if you notice you are tired all the time. Toxic relationships can be harmful to your body, so it is important to pay attention to these signs.

You Get Criticized A Lot

While you want a partner who will challenge you to become your best self, you don’t want to be with someone who is asking you things in a way that seems critical or controlling. While it may be a fine line between providing helpful advice and being controlling over your behavior, it is important to be on the lookout for the difference between the two.

Your Partner Doesn’t Pay Attention to Your Schedule

Of course you don’t need your partner to keep a record of where you are all day, they should remember any key events or important dates that are going on in your life and be supportive of those things. For example, if your partner plans a night out with his friends on your sister’s wedding night– he probably isn’t keeping you in the front of his mind.

It is probably ok if this happens once or twice, but if your partner is regularly forgetting about big meetings at your work or asking you to do things for them when you have made it clear you are very busy with personal things, that is different.

They Take the Role of the Victim

If your partner is always blaming other people when something goes wrong, this can be a sign of toxic behavior. To be in a healthy relationship, it is important to be able to own your feelings and work through problems.

You Have to Make Excuses For Their Behavior

If you have to constantly excuse your partner’s behavior to others, this is a sign of a problem. If you talk to your partner about their behavior and they don’t listen to your concerns, it is likely time to re-think your relationship.

If any of these sound familiar to you, it may be important to take a closer look at your relationship and how it makes you feel. A toxic relationship can only get worse and it is best to cut it off sooner rather than later.

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