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Signs You Are in a Non-Commital Relationship

June 10, 2019 by

Non-committal relationships are common, and have now been coined by the term “situationship.”

This type of relationship is one that has not been defined. Maybe you have had a few dates, but you haven’t yet had the conversation regarding where the relationship is going. So why put a label on a relationship that literally has no label?

With online relationships being such a common thing, people have so many options and it is difficult to commit to one person when it is so easy to access a sea of people who want to be in a relationship.

Sometimes, being in a situationship allows you to have the time to get to know somebody without being rushed to get into a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. The problem is, often one partner starts to have feelings for the other when you’re in any kind of intimate relationship.

Once these emotions start to build, being in a situationship is no longer ideal for someone. One person starts to feel rejected because the other doesn’t fully want them. But how do you know if you are in this position?

Here’s how to tell if you’re on the road to getting your feelings crushed by the person who you want to be your main squeeze.

1. Your plans are always last-minute.

People in strong relationships make plans far in advance, but when you are in a situationship, you tend to operate on a more day-to-day timeline. You aren’t invited to meet the family and you don’t assume you will see each other every weekend. If you only meet up at the last minute, it means that you are not the other person’s priority.

2. There’s no consistency.

One thing that people really love about being in relationships is that they can depend on seeing and talking to their partner on a regular basis. When you are in a situationship, that isn’t really the case. Just because the person asks to hang out with you twice in one week doesn’t guarantee they will see you at all the following week.

3. You hear the same excuse a lot.

You probably hear the other person say that they are really busy at work or they have a lot going on when you ask them if they want to go out. If you’re in a situationship, these kinds of things are excuses. However, if you are in a relationship, these excuses will lead to a plan B, such as: “Let’s go out after I finish this big work project” or “Let me call you after I get a few things off of my to-do list.”

This is because people in a relationship make time for each other, no matter what else they have going on. There is no need to problem solve to see your partner in a situationship because they are not your priority.

4. You don’t talk about a future together.

Conversations in situationships don’t involve much past the present moment. You are not in the relationship for the long term, so there is no need to discuss future career goals or where you may want to live in a few years.

If you haven’t talked about the future or the things you’re looking for, you’re probably in a situationship, meaning you are just sharing current activities and hanging out without heading in a major direction.

5. They tell or show you that they don’t want to get serious.

The other person may be quite frank with you and tell you that they don’t want to be in a serious relationship. They may also show you this through their actions, such as if they’re not calling you on a regular basis or not showing you in any way that you are a priority in their life.

So what are you supposed to do if you want to take your situationship to the next level?

You need to be honest with the other person (and with yourself) and let them know that you want something more than just a relationship out of convenience. Be up front with the person and tell them that you care about them and you want to be in an exclusive relationship. If those feelings are not reciprocated, then it is best for you to move on anyway.

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