Preferred Fitness Blog

Our goal is to offer the opportunity to the sharing of experiences and info related to HEALTH, FITNESS, PROMOS and upcoming EVENTS.

  1. What Does Your Tongue Say About Your Health?

    May 8, 2018 by

    When people are sick, they often get a warning from the symptoms that they are experiencing. Most people can figure out what is wrong with them by their symptoms, like having the flu or a cold. While sometimes a symptom is a side effect of another health issue, other times the symptom itself is the problem. Because of this, it is important to pay attention to your body when things change.

    The appearance of your tongue is one thing that you may not realize you should be paying attention to. Knowing what to look for when it comes to changes in your tongue can help you to make important lifestyle choices that will lead to better health.

    Your tongue is a muscle that is covered with tissue called mucosa. Aside from needing your tongue for speech, it is also critical for chewing, tasting, and swallowing food. When you experience certain health conditions, you may find that you taste things differently. Your tongue has many nerves transmitting signals to your brain.

    When it is healthy, your tongue is covered with pink tissue and small bumps, which is where your taste buds live. Look at your tongue in the mirror. If you ever notice any deviations from its normal appearance, that means it may be time to change some things about your health.

    Vitamin Deficiencies

    Micronutrient deficiencies can lead to negative health consequences, and changes to your tongue may be a sign of a vitamin deficiency. For example, if your tongue is bright red, smooth, and swollen, it may be a sign that you have an iron, folate, or vitamin B12 deficiency. Vitamin B12 and iron are needed to create the normal bumps on the tongue. If you are deficient in these, you lose those bumps, making your tongue appear very smooth.

    A vitamin B12 deficiency can also lead to sensory changes on your tongue because the vitamin is an important part of the healthy neurological function of your taste buds. This specific condition is more often seen in older women who experience altered taste sensation and dry mouth.

    A bright red, swollen tongue can also be an indication of a condition called Kawasaki disease, which is most commonly seen in children under 5, and also includes a high fever. Symptoms of this disease are caused by inflammation of arteries throughout the body.

    Poor Oral Hygiene

    The bumps on your tongue grow throughout your life. These bumps (also refereed to as papilla) are worn down when you eat and drink. However, if they become overgrown, they create an area for fungus and bacterial growth. This may happen after a course of antibiotics or to those suffering from diabetes or have been receiving chemotherapy. However, in some cases it is caused by poor oral hygiene and can occur due to lifestyle choices like smoking.


    Canker sores may occur on the tongue when you’re stressed. These typically last for two weeks and are relatively painful for the first few days. People who are run down or living under a lot of stress are typically prone to these ulcers. In some people, acidic foods, such as citrus fruits, can lead to a canker sore.

    Aging and Allergies

    Fissures may begin to occur with age, but can also be hereditary. Fissures are not typically a health concern, but they do allow debris to accumulate and increase your potential for developing an infection that can lead to bad breath and a change in your ability to taste. Fissures often appear for the first time during childhood, but then deepen as you get older.

    Certain allergies may lead to an issue called geographic tongue. This is a condition that causes patches on the tongue that change in size and location. In some cases, people can have soreness or burning with geographic tongue. Once the allergen has been removed, the condition is able to resolve itself.

    While you may have not considered doing so before, it is important to pay attention to your tongue. It may be able to give you some insight into further health conditions.

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  2. Things You Can Always Refuse to Do at Work

    May 7, 2018 by

    It is probably difficult to say “no” to your boss. You work for the company, so you probably assume that you are supposed to do everything that you are told to do.

    However, this is not always the case. There are some instances when you can (and should) say “no” at work and not feel bad about it. Additionally, by saying “no” to some of these things, you may make a positive impression on your boss and make an improvement for your company.

    Here are nine things that you can and should say “no” to at work.

    1. Doing pointless tasks.

    Just because your company has always done something a certain way doesn’t mean that they aren’t ready for you to come in and switch it up– updating their system to a more effective way of doing things. Doing pointless or ineffective assignments isn’t only expensive for your company, but it can also be harmful to your work.

    2. Tasks that have nothing to do with your job.

    You should know exactly what is expected of you and be clear on your long term goals at work. If you are asked to do something that really has nothing to do with you or your role in the company, do not be afraid to say “no”.

    3. Attending pointless meetings.

    Studies have shown that attending meetings often keeps employees from getting their work done. Additionally, many employees agree that the bulk of their meetings are both inefficient and unproductive, which simply wastes company time.

    4. Responding to emails when you are not at work.

    We all know that work is an important part of life, but it is also important to maintain a social life and spend time with your family. Create boundaries that clarify when work ends and your personal life begins. Formal boundaries have even started to be implemented around the world, such as New York City’s proposed ban to disable instant messages and email after working hours.

    5. Assignments that go against your values.

    This could easily vary depending on the nature of your job, but if you are assigned a task that you are really not comfortable with on a personal level, refuse to do it or suggest doing it in a different way. Don’t compromise yourself and your values for your job.

    6. Short deadlines on unimportant projects.

    There is a big difference between requesting that employees are sensitive about time on a project and demanding a project to be finished before it is really even possible. In the same vein, you should not agree to do projects that you can’t finish on time because this will reflect poorly on your work performance. Instead, spend some time figuring out whether the proposed project is feasible for you to work on given the things that you already have going on.

    7. Writing a reference for someone you do not believe in.

    If someone asks you to write a reference for them and you don’t have complete confidence in their work, it is better to politely decline. While you may need to provide working dates for a previous employee to their prospective employer, you do not need to give a personal reference regarding their job performance.

    8. Even more extra work.

    If you have already taken on more work than your job really requires, do not feel like you have to say yes to additional projects that come in. This will make the quality of all of your work suffer and that will likely be apparent in the end product. Only take on the amount of work that you can reasonably handle at one time.

    9. Work that is beyond your competencies.

    If you are given a project that you know you will not be able to do justice, pass it along to the person who you think it would be more suitable for. Realizing that you may not be the best person to do something is actually going to be helpful for everyone in the end.

    Saying “no” is often important when you are a working professional. Clearly state your reasoning when you refuse to do a task and offer an alternative solution if you can. This will keep you from sacrificing the quality of your work and it will set correct expectations for your coworkers.

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  3. Are You in a Toxic Relationship?

    May 6, 2018 by

    You probably realize by just the term that a toxic relationship is bad, but how do you know if you are in one? What does that really mean?

    It is true that toxic relationships may be difficult to spot. While some abusive behaviors are obviously unhealthy, other signs may be more subtle. However, they can be just as detrimental.

    No relationship is perfect and every relationship is somewhere on the spectrum of toxicity. Relationships can always use some work, but when a toxic relationship becomes out of control, problems will arise. Here are some signs that you might be in a toxic relationship.

    Your Partner Never Admits Fault

    If you have to walk on eggshells when reminding your partner to clean up their clothes, that is likely a red flag. People who are healthy welcome feedback and put themselves back on the right track. However, a toxic partner may blame you for the fact that they somehow messed up.

    It is important to remember that this can go both ways. Think about how your partner affects you, but also consider how you affect your partner. If you are the one who is constantly turning things around, you may be the one who is making the relationship toxic.

    You Don’t Take Care of Yourself

    Your own behavior can indicate that you have a toxic partner. The act of self-care is critical to the success of every relationship to keep it healthy. If you?re not taking care of yourself for any reason (like constantly changing your schedule to suit your partner) it is a sign that the relationship is becoming toxic.

    You Get the Cold Shoulder

    It is normal for partners to have arguments, but if your partner shuts down when you approach them about something that is on your mind, this may be a sign of a toxic relationship. In a healthy relationship, each partner is willing to listen to the other person’s feedback because they want each other to be happy. People want to be able to effectively communicate with their partner to work out the kinks. If your partner keeps telling you that they don?t want to talk about the relationship, looks away, and becomes unresponsive, that?s a sign of toxicity.

    You’re Exhausted

    If your relationship feels like it is draining you and leaving you with very little energy to spare, this is not a good sign. This feeling may even begin to show itself physically if you notice you are tired all the time. Toxic relationships can be harmful to your body, so it is important to pay attention to these signs.

    You Get Criticized A Lot

    While you want a partner who will challenge you to become your best self, you don’t want to be with someone who is asking you things in a way that seems critical or controlling. While it may be a fine line between providing helpful advice and being controlling over your behavior, it is important to be on the lookout for the difference between the two.

    Your Partner Doesn’t Pay Attention to Your Schedule

    Of course you don’t need your partner to keep a record of where you are all day, they should remember any key events or important dates that are going on in your life and be supportive of those things. For example, if your partner plans a night out with his friends on your sister’s wedding night– he probably isn’t keeping you in the front of his mind.

    It is probably ok if this happens once or twice, but if your partner is regularly forgetting about big meetings at your work or asking you to do things for them when you have made it clear you are very busy with personal things, that is different.

    They Take the Role of the Victim

    If your partner is always blaming other people when something goes wrong, this can be a sign of toxic behavior. To be in a healthy relationship, it is important to be able to own your feelings and work through problems.

    You Have to Make Excuses For Their Behavior

    If you have to constantly excuse your partner’s behavior to others, this is a sign of a problem. If you talk to your partner about their behavior and they don’t listen to your concerns, it is likely time to re-think your relationship.

    If any of these sound familiar to you, it may be important to take a closer look at your relationship and how it makes you feel. A toxic relationship can only get worse and it is best to cut it off sooner rather than later.

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  4. Vitamin D Deficiency and Dementia

    May 5, 2018 by

    Most people are aware that vitamin D is an important vitamin to have in your diet to maintain proper health. A vitamin D deficiency has been linked to multiple sclerosis, osteoporosis, heart disease, hypertension, asthma, diabetes, and cancer. However, a new study has found that a vitamin D deficiency can also play a role in developing dementia and Alzheimer?s disease.

    Vitamin D is a group of secosteroids that is primarily responsible for helping your body absorb minerals such as calcium, iron, zinc, magnesium, and phosphate. Approximately 40-75% of adults have a vitamin D deficiency, which is likely due to the fact that very few foods contain vitamin D. While this important vitamin can be absorbed through sunlight, the concerns of skin cancer often keep people out of the sun.

    An international study recently monitored the health of over 1,600 seniors for 6 years and found that people who were extremely deficient in vitamin D had more than double the chances of developing Alzheimer?s disease and dementia than those who consistently had adequate levels of this vitamin in their system.

    Participants in this study who had a mild deficiency had a 53% increased risk of developing dementia, while participants who were severely deficient had a 125% increased risk. This association was twice as strong as the researchers expected. However, researchers are hesitant to claim that a vitamin D deficiency leads to dementia. More research is needed to establish whether consuming enough of the vitamin can prevent, treat, or delay Alzheimer?s.

    However, a recent study adds to the existing body of evidence that links a vitamin D deficiency with cognitive decline. Researchers evaluated 382 participants for five years to study the vitamin D levels in each participant. They found that those who had a diagnosis of dementia lower levels of vitamin D in their blood on average than the other groups. In another study, researchers found that people who used a vitamin D supplement typically had a lower rate of cognitive decline.

    How to Increase Your Vitamin D Levels

    Adults under the age of 70 are recommended to consume 600 IU/day of vitamin D, and those who are over 70 should increase their consumption of vitamin D to 800 IU/day. Adults require more vitamin D with age because they usually spend less time outside and therefore do not get the amount of vitamin D they should from the sun.

    The sun is a great source of vitamin D, however, there is also a concern about skin cancer risks, which makes people want to get their vitamin D from a different source. Some food sources that have vitamin D in them include:

    • Milk (fortified with vitamin D)
    • Beef liver
    • Swordfish
    • Salmon
    • Tuna
    • Orange Juice
    • Yogurt (fortified with vitamin D)
    • Beef liver
    • Cod liver oil

    When you take the necessary steps to increase your levels and consumption of vitamin D, it is more than just your brain health that will improve. For example, vitamin D is important in many areas of your body and having a deficiency has been linked to problems such as macular degeneration, multiple sclerosis, lupus, bowel diseases, and chronic cardiovascular disease.

    Additionally, consuming a high amount of vitamin D is one of the best ways to prevent the flu and can also lower your risk for certain types of cancer. Vitamin D also improves heart health, as it encourages the production of nitric oxide. This molecule aids in the control of blood flow and helps to prevent blood clots from forming within the blood vessels. Also, vitamin D is able to reduce the oxidative stress in the vascular system, which can help prevent heart disease.

    To keep your health at optimal levels, take a vitamin D supplement or eat a diet that is high in vitamin D. Not only will it protect your brain health, but it will also help your body in other ways.

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  5. Impressive Health Benefits of Sage

    May 4, 2018 by

    When you think of sage, you probably think of fall and cooking with this herb to give all of your dinners a rich flavor. However, it is not often realized that there are many health benefits of this herb.

    This perennial herb is impressive when it comes to its positive impact on health. Sage is very similar to rosemary, and is often considered to be a close sister to this herb. In fact, a lot of the health benefits that you get from sage are derived from the organic compound that is found in rosemary.

    The traditional use of medicinal sage is dates back thousands of years. In ancient years, it was used for treating snakebites, boosting fertility, among other uses. However, modern medicinal research has shown that sage has an impact on the human body, which is why it is why it is popular worldwide.

    With its culinary uses and medicinal impact, sage is a valuable herb for our health. Here are some details of its health benefits.

    Improves Brain Health

    Studies have shown that when sage is consumed, recall abilities and memory retention can be increased. Brain activity has also suggested an increase in concentration, meaning that adding some sage to your diet may be an effective brain booster.


    Sage has flavonoids and phenolic compounds that reduce inflammation. People who suffer from inflammatory issues can help reduce the inflammation in their body by chewing on sage or creating a tea from steeping sage. The anti-inflammatory qualities of this herb help health problems such as general inflammation, arthritis, and gout, which can result in cardiovascular disease and high blood pressure.


    Free radicals lead to chronic and degenerative diseases that lead to dangerous health concerns. Free radicals cause the body harm by attacking healthy cells and causing them to mutate. However, the antioxidant compounds in sage can neutralize free radicals and stop their harmful effects that lead to oxidative stress in the body.

    Alzheimer’s Prevention

    Sage has the ability to improve brain function and memory, and it also helps eliminate potential cognitive disorders such as Alzheimer?s and dementia. The research on this is still in its early stages, but it is showing promising effects. The neural pathways that are stimulated by sage can keep the mind young well into older age.

    Immune System Booster

    Sage has antimicrobial properties and can be used in the creation of a topical application, such as a salve or a tincture, to prevent bacterial and viral infections. While bacteria usually enter through our nose and mouth, the skin can also be used as a gateway for harmful bacteria. An antibacterial routine for the skin that includes sage can provide extra protection against this kind of illness.

    Improves Bone Health

    Sage has superior level of vitamin K, which is an essential vitamin that is not found in many foods. Vitamin K is critical for the development of bone density and ensuring bone health as we age. If you have lived a nutrient-poor or sedentary lifestyle, your bone health is likely compromised. Consuming sage can increase your body’s levels of vitamin K, as one serving of sage has 27% of the daily recommended intake.

    Skin Care

    Sage can be used on the skin to help certain skin conditions, including eczema, psoriasis, and acne. These blemishes that are caused by these skin conditions can be soothed and their appearance can be improved with a regular application of topical sage extracts and salves.

    Digestive Aid

    The rosmarinic acid in sage has anti-inflammatory properties that aid the gastrointestinal system. Sage can help reduce or prevent gastric spasms and can reduce the occurrence of diarrhea and gastritis. Adding sage to your diet can reduce inflammation in the gut.

    Manage Diabetes

    When it comes to managing diabetes, it is widely agreed that sage is a very effective tool. It contains extracts and chemicals that work in the same ways as the drugs that are usually prescribed to manage diabetes. Sage can regulate and stop the release of stored glucose in the liver, which prevents fluctuations in blood sugar and the onset of type 2 diabetes. It can also help manage diabetes if it has already been diagnosed.

    There are many benefits of sage that people do not often consider when they are cooking with it. Consider adding more sage to your diet to experience these health benefits and to add more flavor to your meals.

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  6. Strawberries Linked with High Pesticide Residue

    May 3, 2018 by

    If you are skeptical of the positive things you hear about eating organic produce, maybe you should at least consider buying organic strawberries. Research continues to show that this fruit in particular holds onto harmful pesticides long past when they are picked for your consumption.

    For the third year in a row, strawberries are at the top of the “dirty dozen” list for fresh produce. This list refers to the twelve produce items that contain the largest amount of pesticide residue. These foods should therefore be eaten organically to reduce one’s intake of harmful chemicals.

    The report that lists the dirty dozen bases its findings on almost 40,000 USDA tests of 47 different fruits and vegetables. The study found that almost 70% of produce that is conventionally grown had remnants of pesticides on them and 98% of the top five items on the dirty dozen had at least one pesticide on them.

    When it comes to strawberries, up to 22 different pesticides have been found on a single berry. In studies, almost all (99%) of the samples found at least one pesticide residue that was able to be detected, and 20% contained at least ten and often more than that. Researchers found the residues of 81 different pesticides in a variety of combinations on the samples of strawberries that were tested, with an average of 7.8 different pesticides per sample.

    To compare this to other foods on the dirty dozen list, other items has an average of 2.1 pesticides on each sample. Strawberries likely top this list because they are one of the crops that is the most heavily sprayed with pesticides. In fact, almost 300 pounds of pesticides are put onto each acre of strawberries that are grown in California. Additionally, nerve gases are used to kill insects that may harm the plants and existing weeds that are taking up space in the soil before planting the berries.

    While there are a lot of chemicals used on strawberries, some of the most concerning are carbendazim, which disrupts hormones, bifenthrin, when has been identified as a possible carcinogen, and chloropicrin, which is the active ingredient in tear gas. These chemicals can lead to adverse health effects that are related to pregnancy complications and even to children with low IQs.

    After strawberries on this list of possibly harmful produce was spinach, where 97% of the samples that were studied had pesticide residues. The next three on the list were nectarines, apples, and grapes.

    However, there is also a list that exists that is called the “Clean Fifteen” list. This shows the produce that is the least likely to show any signs of pesticide residues. For example, fewer than 1% of samples taken from avocado and sweet corn had any pesticide residue, which put these foods as the top two on the list of the clean fifteen.

    Some other foods that are generally safe to buy conventionally rather than organically are pineapples, cabbage, papayas, asparagus, and onions. These items were shown to have no pesticide residue on them over 80% of the time.

    The good news is that the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency notes that today’s fruits and vegetables are more safe to eat than they ever have been. While the dirty dozen list does show foods that are better eaten organically, the USDA and U.S. Food and Drug Administration data also show that 99% of the residues that are found on these foods are far below the safety levels that are set by the Environmental Protection Agency. This means that our bodies are able to handle the low amount of pesticide residue that is often found on conventionally-grown fruits and vegetables.

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  7. The Importance of Stretching After Running

    May 2, 2018 by

    Do you take the time to stretch before or after you run? Many people don?t, because once your run is over you feel like you have completed your task.

    However, stretching is a really important part of exercising. After making your muscles move in the same motion for an extended period of time, you need to give them some time to recover.

    Doing the right stretches that allow you to move your muscles in various planes of motion and prevent them from becoming tight can help you keep a good running form, increase your flexibility, and reduce your risk of becoming injured.

    Here are seven stretches that every runner should do after their workout. These stretches will target your main running muscles along with some smaller muscles in your upper body and feet.

    Hamstring Stretch

    To do this, lie on your back and extend both legs. Lift one leg up and reach your hands behind the knee of the lifted leg. Gently pull your leg toward your body to feel a stretch. Extend and flex your ankle five times. Pull your leg further toward your body for a few seconds for a deeper stretch. Repeat this move three times.

    This is important because the nerves in your legs are able to get caught up in your muscles and limit the range of motion in your hamstrings, which can lead to pain. Stretches like this performed regularly can help loosen the area and give your hamstrings the range of motion they should have.

    Downward Dog

    Start in a plank position, lift your hips and straighten your arms to create an upside down ?V?. Alternate pressing each heel into the ground while in this position.

    This is an important stretch for the calves because it will let them move efficiently and reduce possible injuries such as shin splints, Achilles tendinitis, and plantar fasciitis. This exercise can also stretch your shoulders, which can help your during running due to arm swing power.

    Adductor Stretch

    Get down on all fours with your arms under your shoulders and your knees directly below your hips. Place your right leg out to the side, keeping your foot flat on the ground and your toes facing forward. Sit back toward your heels while maintaining a neutral spine. Stay in this position for three seconds before walking your hands forward past your starting position. Do this ten times for each leg.

    This set of muscles helps in hip extension and stabilizing the knees. Both of these are important in running and are used throughout the entire workout. Keeping these muscles mobile will help prevent injuries.

    Three-Way Dynamic Quad Stretch

    Get down on one knee, making sure your hips and knees are at a 90 degree angle. Put your hands on your left knee while squeezing the glutes in your right leg. With a neutral spine, slightly move your body forward, lifting your left knee towards your toes. Repeat this on the other side.

    This stretch will help loosen up your muscles and reduce the tension in your hip flexors. Stretching these muscles in all of their ranges of motion will help decrease the likelihood of experiencing tight muscles.

    Tibias Anterior/Superior Foot Stretch

    Stand up straight and lift your right foot behind you slightly off the ground. Point your toes and put some pressure on the tops of your feet while keeping your pointed, while slightly moving around the tops of your toes. Do this on both sides. Doing this will help keep the muscles around the front of your shin flexible, which will give you maximum momentum when you push off of the ground. ?that way it can help produce maximum drive as you push off the ground.

    Glute Stretch

    Lie on your back with both of your knees at a 90 degree angle and your feet resting on a wall. Rest one foot on opposite knee and gently push against the elevated knee for 30 seconds. This will help stretch the gluteus maximus which can become painful if it gets too tight.

    Sleeper Stretch

    Lie on your right side with your right arm stretched perpendicular from your body. Roll your left shoulder back just a bit so your shoulders are not exactly aligned. Bend your right elbow at a 90 degree angle. Then, using your left hand, gently push your right hand down toward your feet. Once you feel the stretch, hold it for 30 seconds before switching to the other side.

    Because your shoulders are important to your form while running, making sure they?re flexible can give you more mobility and help you become a more efficient runner.

    If you run on a regular basis, try these 7 stretches to make sure that you stay in shape and prepared to keep running. Your body will feel great after you take care of your muscles, especially if you are doing the repetitive motion of running on a regular basis.

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  8. Best Muscle Workouts For Your Glutes

    May 1, 2018 by

    Are you trying to get optimal muscle definition for the summer months? If so, you may be starting to hit the gym or research some weight training ideas online to slim down a bit.

    You probably are already familiar with doing a squat, as they are an effective way to sculpt your legs and they are easy enough to do in the correct form. However, adding weights to this move can intensify it so it will work even harder for you. This will help your muscles become more defined and leaner to get that sculpted beach body.

    If you want to get the most out of your squats, have you considered doing variations such as the goblet sumo squat or the dumbbell squat thrust? These two moves add a little extra effort to the traditional squat, but make an incredible difference in the outcome. They add weight and an increased amount of motion, which will force your body to work a bit harder, but it will also produce greater results.

    These moves are superior because they cause you to move up and down, creating tension on your muscles until you are finished with your entire set. Your muscles are then working constantly throughout the duration of the exercise so they remain activated and engaged. This helps build size and strength and keeps you moving through the entire exercise so your muscles don’t get a break until all of your reps are complete. It is best to do these exercising until your muscles are fatigued.

    The dumbbell squat thrust is great at putting stress on your glutes during the squat exercise, but it lets that tension go as you jump out of your plank position. This means it is a bit less powerful for your legs than the previously stated goblet sumpo squat. However, this phase of the exercise is powerful for the upper body and abdomen, which are both important muscle groups to pay attention to when you are doing weightlifting.

    Both of these moves are very helpful to do in your exercise regimen, but if you really want to focus on your backside, the goblet squat jump is the best. Try adding these moves to your exercise routine at least three times a week (but no more than four) to increase the strength in your muscles

    How to do a Goblet Squat Jump

    Hold onto the head of a heavy dumbbell directly in front of your chest. Stand with your feet a bit wider than your shoulders with your toes slightly facing outwards. Bend your knees and push your hips back to lower your body. Stop here for a minute to feel the tension in your muscles before slowly straightening your legs back up to the position in which you started.

    How to do a Dumbbell Squat Thrust

    Stand with your feet directly below your hips while holding a dumbbell in each hand. Bend your knees and push your hips back to get into a squatting position. Put the weights down on the floor and hop back up into a push up position. Stay in this position for a moment to feel the tension, then do the movement in reverse and return to standing.

    After doing these exercises, make sure to give your muscles time to relax and recover. Stretch them out a bit and stay hydrated so they don’t become tense or tight. After doing these exercises for a few weeks, you will start to notice a change in the shape of your body and in the amount of strength you are able to put forth.

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  9. A Word You Should Definitely Avoid in a Fight

    April 10, 2018 by

    If you are having a fight with a loved one, are there things that you try to avoid saying? If not, there should be.

    The word ‘but’ is a very destructive word to use in an argument or in an important conversation with someone. This is because hearing the word ‘but’ puts people on the defense and causes them to only look at the negative parts of what you are saying.

    Rather than using the word ‘but’, say ‘and’ when you are speaking with someone you love.

    Even small words can make a big difference in your communication.

    Saying ‘but’ is a quick way to delete everything loving and positive you have said in the past. Sometimes you may not realize how powerful the word ‘but’ is. However, it causes people to tighten up and shut down.

    Here are a few examples of conversations that include the word ‘but’ that likely end up going in the wrong direction.

    Here are some classic examples of what I mean:

    The Speaker: “I really like you, but I am very frustrated.”

    The Listener:”So, you don’t really like me?”

    Even if the listener doesn’t come out and say it, they likely feel like they are being slighted.

    The good thing is, there are some better words to use than ‘but’. Try saying ‘and’ instead. Can you see the difference?

    “I really like you, and I am very frustrated.”

    This statement is not negating the fact that the speaker like the person to whom they are speaking. It simply adds something to that statement. Even though what they are saying is negative, it is not taking away from the fact that the speaker likes the listener.

    There are likely a lot of instances when you do not mean to sound negative, but what you are saying comes off as being negative. Even if it so little as changing one word, how you speak can completely change people’s perception of you and their interpretation of what you are saying.

    It is also important to be aware of words that replace the word ‘but’ while still saying the same thing. For example:

    “You did a really good job, however,…”
    “You have said some good things, yet…”

    You may find all of this to be a bit of a stretch because this little word and its accompanying attitude is a deeply ingrained part of our culture and language.

    Of course, there are some great ways of using ‘but’ as long as you know how it will impact the other person’s comprehension of what you are saying. For example, you can use it when you are acknowledging something that is negative while also wanting to emphasize a positive alternative. Here are a few instances where that could be true:

    “That wasn’t your best work, BUT I know you will improve in the future.”

    “We did not do a great job on that project, BUT I think we can learn from our mistakes and still get something out of this experience.”

    “This project is going to be very difficult, BUT I know we can pull it together.”

    The point is, good intentions are not always enough to offset bad wording. It is best to be very cognizant of how you speak to other people so your words are not up for interpretation and people are always aware that you are coming from a good place when you give them feedback or make comments about something that is going on.

    Think before the next time you say ‘but’ and decide if it is truly necessary before you say it, just to make sure that you are coming across exactly as you are meaning to.

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  10. Men’s Haircuts That Are in Style

    April 9, 2018 by

    Are you looking for a new look, but not quite sure where to go with it? Haircut trends change pretty quickly, which is fine since you are able to re-style your hair relatively often as it grows. There are certainly some haircuts that will never go out of style, but this year, there are great trends that are all perfect for looking clean-cut and presentable. Here are three men’s haircuts that are in style for 2018.

    1. Long and Clean Layers

    This look allows men to have a business-looking, yet slightly casual style. Men have been wearing their hair longer in recent years, which has inspired this particular style. Giving the hair a layered appearance can be done on any kind of hair, from straight to wavy to curly.

    If you want this style, the best thing to tell you barber is that you don’t want you hair to come above your jawline and it can be as long as your shoulders. This cut is best for men who have full volume hair, but if you have a slight recession, you can still look great with this haircut. Make sure to get your hair cut about every eight weeks as it grows out. If you do not get your hair cut enough, it will not grow out properly and will lose its intended shape. A barber will be able to add the right texture to your cut so it always looks fresh.

    Talk to your barber about what kind of products you will need to best suit your hair type. Some common products that are great for maintaining your hair through the day are a high-quality moisturizing cream or a simple styling mousse to provide lightweight control and a bit of texture.

    2. A Faded Look

    A faded haircut is really great for men who have hair that is beginning to get thin. This type of style will make thinning hair look thicker. One of the problems with thinning hair is that if you let it grow long, others are able to see through it and it can make it look even thinner than it actually is. However, if you cut it short, keeping your hair close to your scalp, it will make it look like your hair is thicker and has some great volume.

    Ask your hair stylist for a tight fade in order to get this look. The amount of hair that you want to leave on the top of your head is a personal preference, but it is best to make sure that it is faded pretty high up on the sides. Finish off your look using a light cream or a high-quality smoothing oil to keep the shape without any added volume or product residue. Try: Majesticel Argan Oil Serum for Hair ($15, Buy It Here).

    The Classic Crop: Always on trend

    One medium-length trend (that has carried over from past years) is to keep the sides short with a longer top. ?This look is best on men with medium to thick hair, and it works on both straight and curly textures,? Priano says. Ask your barber to use a clipper on the sides and back, and he or she will switch to scissors on top. You?ll need three inches or more up top to pull it off. Use a paste with medium to high hold to style the look and to give your hair

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